Submerge, Merge, Emerge

(been a while since I’ve shared but recently been inspired to write again, not just from the head but from the heart… but like you say, “good things take time”, and as promised, “always write…”)

For me… It had been six months of outbursts and release, sporadic moments of excitement and unanticipated bouts of silence, of seemingly meaningless expressions leading to profound meaning under layers of spontaneity; a sense of truth and trust as the masks slowly faded to the wayside, and a sense of security from deep within soon resonated as a sense of belonging.

It was months of freedom amidst the chaos of chasing shadows only to outrun them, of fearing the light only to be mesmerised by its beauty; months of emerging from the abyss of one’s subconscious in search of the flow leading to the shore, of embracing and becoming consumed by one’s own storms only to find within the depths of mysteries lay a yearning for peace and presence.

It was months of spiralling, but contrary to popular understanding of ‘spirals’, t’was not a downward one rather an upward spin out of a purging whirlpool, one that would essentially propel towards the shore.

It was months of coming up and out, of riding the waves as the winds and waters pumped the adrenaline (or norepinephrine, as some prefer to call it) that invigorated a sense of life.

And as sudden as the seas rose with the winds of the storm, just as quickly did they merge into a whirlpool that silenced its unpredictability.

It was then that I knew.

There was a certainty to the calm and a stability to the freedom as we just floated there catching our breaths in awe and amazement.

And just like that, we saw the emergence of clarity as freedom and peace merged.

Freedom is peace, and, in parallel, peace… is freedom… when we’re surfing the surface loving life itself; but is it stagnation if we remain submerged for too long merely surviving our fears…?

Balance. That’s really what it is. 

Though perhaps peace seems less like freedom if one is accustomed to thriving in chaos, and can present as chaos if one fears its presence; when towed by undercurrents of ego then freedom is nothing more than destruction but when it comes from a place of love then it’s both peaceful and inspiring.

.

Freedom…

I thought it meant doing whatever we want, and to some extent that’s true— 

but what if what we want is choosing to be natural, as natural as nature is free — to live, to laugh, to learn, and love; to enjoy, to explore, to experience; to grow and glow with the flow, to embody and emanate a natural consistency, transparency, connection, and trust.

That sense of belonging that comes from deep within, that sense of being free to be, to experience and/or to express, be it alone or with company.

I used to think freedom was reckless, but you show me that it means peace, that it’s as much the adrenaline and excitement of surfing the waves as it is the relaxation and stillness of falling asleep on the beach, that it’s as much the desire to feel alive as it is the need to live.

That it is indeed when we find within ourselves a calm within the chaos that we find peace within that freedom.

You show me that that’s what it means to be happy.

It is a happiness that inspires and transpires as presence and does not expire like reckless abandon.

It is a beauty we see and sense rather than find or misplace, an essence that blooms rather than burns, a fire that fuels rather than fights, a metal that melts and moulds rather than malts or moults. 

It is a body of water that envelops as the waves gently embrace the shores without drowning out or deluging its substance.

Freedom is the peace that we intrinsically embody, as peace is that freedom we inherently become.

And when we are what we embody, we submerge, merge, and emerge. 

But when we are what we embody, do we strive to hold onto it, appreciate it for what it is, or do we emanate it as the waves envelop each other?

Freedom…

…is peace when it comes from a place of love and empathy; but it’s chaos when towed by undercurrents of fear and ego.

It’s the freedom to live and to love, the freedom to be and to breathe, the freedom to grow and to glow, the freedom to experience and to express, to embody, to emanate, to shine and to share in that with who matters.

Freedom is both peace and excitement…when it comes from a place of love.

MG